Since my mom passed away last December my sisters and I have been getting together with her best friend every couple of months for lunch. There is always laughter, sometimes sadness or excitement depending on what’s happening in everyone’s lives. Typically there are strong opinions on various subjects.
I was seeing K (mom’s friend) yesterday for a massage and after she arrived she told me that after our latest lunch she said to her husband “fuck, those women are lovingly fierce”. I laughed, of course. It always makes me laugh a little when K swears because she’s such a well put together, professional with an almost ethereal look. Afterwards I thought again about her wording. That might be the greatest compliment I’ve ever been given.
My mom was fierce. She didn’t back down from a fight if it was worthy, but knew when to let it go. She knew when to soften and when to stand firmly in her spot and not budge. She knew how to love in a way that was unwavering, even when she was angry with you. And you knew when she was angry. She had one of those looks that make kids crumble and tell the truth. She was lovingly fierce.
And now, my sisters and I have been given this great gift too. I hope we can all bring honour to our mom by knowing when to open our hearts with every ounce of ourselves and when to protect ourselves. I hope we know when to let go and when to hang on tight. I hope we use this ‘super power’ for good.
I hope we really are lovingly fierce.